We in the developed world are like homeowners who inherited a house on a piece of land that is beautiful on the outside, but whose soil is unstable loam and rock, heaving and contracting over generations, cracks patched but the deeper ruptures waved away for decades, centuries even. Many people may rightly say, “I had nothing to do with how this all started. I have nothing to do with the sins of the past. My ancestors never attacked indigenous people, never owned slaves.” And, yes. Not one of us was here when this house was built. Our immediate ancestors may have had nothing to do with it, but here we are, the current occupants of a property with stress cracks and bowed walls and fissures built into the foundation. We are the heirs to whatever is right or wrong with it. We did not erect the uneven pillars or joists, but they are ours to deal with now. And any further deterioration is, in fact, on our hands…” – Isabel Wilkerson

In the newsletter 2 weeks ago, Keyno wrote about a minister who just recently passed away but was a minister to this congregation for a short time in the 1980s. She was dismissed after the first year of her three year contract. Keyno wrote, “…her opponents engineered her early dismissal after only one year. It was controversial and divided the congregation. Some members left and stopped coming.” This sort of division has been, and still remains, common in our church communities (not just UU, but all denominations, and obviously, in this war torn world, we divide ourselves in so many ways). It is heartbreaking. But, it is the result of the “stress cracks and bowed walls and fissures built into the foundation” of our house. These stress cracks formed because we don’t know how to address the conflict that results from our differences. The bowed walls are because we see differences as “bad” instead of a path to creative interchange. These fissures in our foundation are because we hold onto the traits of white supremacy culture such as perfectionism, defensiveness, either/or thinking, and power-hoarding instead of appreciation, humility, accountability, complexity, and sharing power. The damage to our house, to our community, results when we don’t put our values and mission first and creatively address conflict. This is an unfortunate heritage. Some say it is just human nature. I read this statement in a Huffington Post article: “Sadly, dividing up into opposing factions is deeply engrained in our primate heritage.” But Homo Sapiens have been on this Earth for 200 to 300 thousand years and our brains are highly developed. We can think well enough beyond letting our primate instincts get the best of us. Let us honor the wonder and the miracle of evolution and use our amazing brains to create beauty!

And that, my beloveds, brings us once again to the good news of Unitarian Universalism. We are inspired by the findings of science. We don’t ignore our history, condemning ourselves to repeat it over and over again as if we don’t understand how neuroplasticity in the brain works. We look at history and science honestly and learn how to move forward in a different way. This is how we engage hope and make it a reality. We don’t just wait for people to change. We change ourselves and how we operate in community, creating a better heritage for those who come after us. We learn how to address conflict and be in right relationship.

Currently, your UUCL Board of Trustees and your Right Relations committee are engaged in a Right Relations training through the UU Institute. We are discovering a different way to be together so that when conflict arises (and it always will!), we can address it in a healthy way, filling in the cracks and the fissures, straightening out those bowed walls, and holding us together instead of dividing us more. If we are to change the world, we must start with ourselves. Like fractals, this way of being together can be replicated throughout the whole of humanity. It will take time, lots of time. But it has to start somewhere. Let us be the good ancestors. Let it be us that begins the restoration of a damaged house.