The moment we cease to hold each other, the moment we break faith with one another, the sea engulfs us, and the light goes out. –James Baldwin
We have reached the end of October 2021. It also means that our theme of “Cultivating Relationships” will begin shifting into our next theme of “Holding History”. I say shifting because I believe that relationships are at the very core of our being. It is our relatedness to each other, to all of life, and to the Earth that defines us as human beings. As we explore the theme of “Holding History” we are also examining the way in which relationships, or the lack of relationships (the moments when faith has been broken), have shaped events and impacted lives, including our own. I look forward to continuing this spiritual journey of relatedness and interdependence with all of you in our worship and programming.
One way of deepening your engagement with our themes and your own spiritual journey is through small group ministry. This year, we are using resources from Soul Matters, a Unitarian Universalist program that helps to foster a journey that the whole church can take together. I am providing you below with one of the spiritual tasks from this program on the theme of Cultivating Relationships. I invite you to delve into the task and do some reflection. Also, consider joining our small group ministry next month (which starts next week!). Email me to sign up or to ask questions: [email protected].
Your Question
Don’t treat these questions like “homework” or try to answer every one. Instead, make time to meditate on the list and then pick the one question that speaks to you most. The goal is to figure out which question is “yours.” Which question captures the call of your inner voice? Which one contains “your work”? And what is that question trying to get you to notice or acknowledge?
Often it helps to read the list to a friend or loved one and ask them which question they think is the question you need to wrestle with!
1. What was the most nourishing new relationship you cultivated during the pandemic time? Was it with an unexpected person? A new habit? A new part of yourself? And what’s your plan to intentionally nourish that relationship moving forward?
2. What’s the wisest thing you were ever taught about cultivating relationships?
3. When was the first time you deeply connected to someone in a way that caused you to also deeply connect with yourself?
4. When did you first realize there was something called “a chosen family”?
5. Which of your friend relationships have lasted the longest? Or gone the deepest? What’s been the secret? And, most importantly, is that a secret you need to pull out and use again in your current life?
6. Is it time to stop cultivating a relationship and instead walk away from it?
7. How are you being called to more intentionally cultivate a relationship with a loved one who has died?
8. Do you ever feel that the push to cultivate relationships is overblown? Do you ever wish our culture (or those around you) had a greater appreciation of aloneness? What is it about aloneness that others around you don’t understand?
9. Are you owed an apology, but afraid to ask for it?
10. What relationship in your life needs restored? What connection have you ignored for too long?
11. How far are you willing to let empathy take you?
12. What “unnoticed” sacred relationship is our country most in danger of severing? What unacknowledged tearing of threads scares you the most?
13. Have you ever encountered “God” in between you and another person? Some say God is the electricity that surges between people. Has that ever rung true for you?